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One month you’ve been gone

December 12, 2016

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Yesterday marked 1 whole month without Zuki physically by my side, there are good days and tough days, days when every little thing reminds you that they are not there. I have taken comfort in surrounding myself by all the beautiful pictures I have of him because then the memories that are stirred up are of the wonderful times we had and not of those final days. His bed is still in its place (at Christmas it gets put next to the Christmas tree and Phoenix likes to take pride of place on it now) and his food bowl still in its spot in the utility room – some people probably think this is a bit silly and I’m sure a day will come when I feel right moving them, but for now they stay, I want him to know he still has a place in our home and our pack.

We brought him home just 4 days after his passing and he has taken pride of place.

I also got a photo book made up (1 for us and 1 for my parents) that has all my favourite pictures in there, that tells his story and makes me smile. Here’s a couple of screen shots of my favourite pages

We have a large canvas of Zuki at the top of our stairs just outside my sons bedroom. He’s only 21 months old but every morning and every evening as I carry him to or from bed, he looks up at that picture and blows Zuki a kiss. It absolutely melts my heart, they had a wonderful bond. When Kaydn is old enough I will show him this book and tell him the story around every one of these pictures, every image is a memory to share. We’ll laugh and we’ll cry and we’ll be inspired. Zuki will live on way beyond his physical years.

Zuki – I miss you my boy, I hope you are looking down on us,  happy and content with the loving and united family you helped create. You influenced me in ways you probably will never understand, you helped to shape me into the woman and mother I am today and I hope I make you proud. Big kisses my soppy bear xxxxxxx




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4 Responses to “One month you’ve been gone”

  1. hester said:

    I think of Zuki often being you lost him so soon after we lost Pofi and in such similar circumstances. Your photos show that he knew how loved and cherished he was. Such a beautiful, beautiful boy. I know you miss him terribly. The photo books look like they turned out wonderfully and I hope they bring solace now and in the future.


  2. linda8115 said:

    What treasured precious memories you have of your beautiful boy! Made me tear up as I looked at them. Such a wondrous life filled with love you shared with your sweet boy. I know the void you have in your life is still wide and deep. To love so deeply means you grieve deeply also. Zuki remains with you always in your memories and most importly in your heart until you meet again.

  3. Deb said:

    I totally get everything you said. It was one month yesterday for us. Some days I can think of Bandit and just smile because of the joy he brought us and some days I cry. The bond between Momma and the fur baby is strong. They will always be in our hearts. I am so happy you have the wonderful memories of your time with him. Take joy in them…Hugs from Deb and Angel Bandit.

  4. benny55 said:

    And my tears flow again. Bittersweet…but more sweet than bitter because of this GLORIOUS tribute you have paid your precious Zuki.

    These pictures are such sacred treasures! They really do speak volumes about the love, the all encompassing love that surrounded Zuki every single day of his life with you and his family!

    And the pictures of Kaydn and Zuki just melt my heart!! OMD!! Priceless! Yes, a true loving bond…a bond that can never be broken!

    Every single photo shows how special Zuki is to his family. And the photos capture such a happy boy who knew how to play, knew how to love and knew how to be loved! And boy oh boy, Zuki was so loved!!

    I KNOW this grief part is so hard. It hurts! You feelmlike your heart is so broken it can never heal. Each timenyou look at a photo, each time a happy memory makes you smile, your heart heals a little bit more. Ih sure, the waves kf vrief still come out of the blue…for years…and probably forever. During those times Zuki will send you a sign, a “feeling”, to let you k ow he is definitely still by your side!

    And for whatever it’s worth, I didn’t move my Happy Hannah’s food bowl for months. When I did, it was a subconscious thing and allmof the sudden I was aware I’d moved it. So then I just made it part of her “celebration of life” corner in the house. BTW, it’s a lovely, lovely way you have of honoring his ashes.

    I thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing this beautiful tribute with us. We all hurt when a special Soul like Zuki transistions. A tribute like this helps us focus on the happy times too!

    Zuki was, without a doubt, a very enlightened Soul! Yes, he was definitely yiur teacher and you were his student!

    As privileged as you felt to have Zuki in your life, he felt just as privileged to have you in hsi! Of course, that’s how he planned it ever since he picked you out as his furever human when he was a puppy! And that fluffy puppy picture…adorable!!

    It is truly an honor to get to k ow Zuki even better with this beautiful celebration album. We want more!! Hint!

    Lots of love to you, Phoenix, Kaydn and hubby!

    Sally and My Chunky Spiritual Being Happy Hannah and Merry Myrtle and Frankie

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